"If you would create
something, first you must
be something.”
Johann Wolfgang
von Goethe

The Best Present You Can Give This Year is Presence
(Sunday, November 22nd, 2015)

The Best Present You Can Give This Year is Presence


As the holiday season approaches our list of things to do grows. Advertisements and marketing ploys encourage us at every opportunity to buy, shop and spend. This week we will be bombarded with Black Friday deals, mark downs and sales and we may spend a lot of time and energy trying to find just the right gift for Aunt Sue or Cousin Ed.

I want to suggest that you hold yourself accountable to give the ultimate gift this year….and that is the gift of your presence and your full undivided attention. When your child comes home from school, or your spouse enters the house after a long day, don’t just give them the obligatory “How are you?” while you are multitasking and doing something else. Stop what you are doing. Look them in the eye, kiss them hello, and sincerely ask how they are. Then be there as a witnessing presence. Hold their gaze and imagine all the love you feel for them leaving your body and enveloping them in light and love.

The best gift you can give another person is not just your time, but your presence. With technology ruling our lives, it is too easy for us to be sitting right next to someone but to be mentally somewhere else in our minds. Having our physical body in the same space isn’t enough anymore when we aren’t engaged, conscious and present. Attention is like sunshine to humans. When we feel the warmth of another person’s attention we grow and bloom.

My husband Gary is brilliant at making me feel like the only person in the room, like every love song was written about me, and that every drop of his attention is being showered over me like the warmth of the sun on a clear day. When he touches me the energy in his hands is electric and not always in a sexual way, but in a deliciously magical present way. In that moment I know that all his attention is on me and it is the most powerful and the best gift he can give.

How do you know when you are present? You know it when you are living in the moment right now. When your mind isn’t thinking about the future or ruminating about the past. When all your senses are engaged in what is in front of you. When you are seeing, smelling, feeling and hearing what is happening in your current space.

How do you practice presence? You practice it by consciously being aware of when you are disconnected from yourself and others. You recognize when the voice in your head has taken over, and when your endless mind chatter hasn’t stopped. You come back to the present moment by taking a few deep breaths and going through your five senses. Thirty seconds of mindful breathing is all that it takes to find presence.

The present moment is where all your power is. It is the place where joy and aliveness lives. It is what happens when you focus on the beauty of a sunset, the sparkle in your lovers eyes, or the sheer joy of your child’s laughter. Don’t miss these moments by not being present in your one and only life. This holiday season and every day choose presence.

Love & Light,

Michele Phillips